Berries, Berries Everywhere
by NorthernShinigami
Summary: One shiny day, Rukia pays Ichigo a visit, just to get some much-needed relaxation in her favorite spot. Unfortunatly, someone else seemed to have inhabited the place. Ichigo finally rented his own apartment, but unlikely visitors keep showing up. Mostly, these who should be dead. A kind-of humoristic story of short drabbles. NOT-Rukia centered
1. Blueberries In The Closet

**Disclaimer**: Kubo Tite owns Bleach. I just own the idea. Or not.

* * *

Rukia took a happy, deep breath of fresh air and opened Ichigo's closet.

_Now this_ was life. The _good_ life. The _fun_ life. Sure, Soul-Society is her home and is good most of the times, with the big Kuchiki estate and all the servants and house-workers to serve her, and her own big, wide room. Even the new tradition of family dinner she started with Renji and her brother was fun, and serving Ukitake-Taicho as his new lieutenant with the two chaotic Third-Seats was also very much fun.

But from time to time going to reside in the Living-World was the best, with the freedom to do what she wanted when she wanted, with no prying eyes watching her every step day and night. Ichigo's inviting house, the warm homey feeling, his small but nicely designed room, and her small, humble corner of relaxation, a place just for herself-

Rukia slide the closet door shut.

She blinked, rubbed her eyes, and slide the door open again.

Then closed it again.

And opened.

"What _the_..."

Someone _else _already occupied Ichigo's closet. Dressed in ripped jeans, black gothic t-shirt and a single earing, electric blue hair sticking out and matching eyes, at first stared at her widely in confusion, then flared in alerted blazing fire as he noticed Rukia's blank expression shift in anger.

She knew this man. He's an Arrancar, was an Espada in Aizen's army, who should be in Hueco Mundo. But that's not what bugged her right now.

"_What?!_" The blue-haired Espada -no doubt in Gigai- barked angrily as he looked up from his magazine, ready for a battle from any Shinigami to challnge him because he's supposedly the _enemy_. And he definitely recognized this one, even with shorter haircut. He attacked and pierced her long time ago, right infront of Ichigo's eyes. "Do you want to fight, _Shinigami?!_"

"I don't care about _that_!" Rukia shrieked, face twisted in fury. "This is **My **room! Get out of _my room_!"

"Huh?" Grimmjow spat in puzzlement, not understanding what's the mad woman is talking about. He snorted. "This is _Kurosaki's _room, midget-"

"No, this is _My _room! _**This!**_ The _**closet! **_It's _my _spot whenever I stay in Karakura town! the closet is _my _room! I _eat _in here, I _sleep _in here, I _live _in here! How dare you steal _**my **_closet?!"

Grimmjow stared at her in shock. "You... you live in Kurosaki's _Closet?_" He said in astonishment, even forgetting to sound angry.

"_Yes!_ Now _get __**out**_**!**" She shrieked and pulled Grimmjow out by the collar, smashing him powerfully against the floor like only she knew how. She jumped inside the closet, stepping on the groaning Espada's face in the process and turned to slide the door shut with a slam.

But not before glaring at the blue-haired Espada furiously one last time and saying; "And don't you _dare _enter my room again, _you __**Pervert!**_"

"What _the __**f**_-"

Ichigo leaned nonchalantly on his bedroom's door frame, looking more interested in the book in his hand than his emotionally-disturbed guests. "Told you it wasn't a good idea."

* * *

Inspired by reading a Yaoi fic about Grimmjow paying Ichigo a visit in his room, snd I thought; what would happen if someone else was to reside in that closet..


	2. Strawberry is Moving?

"Shit. That hurt." Grimmjow groaned and rubbed his face where Rukia stepped on him. "That's going to leave a mark.."

Ichigo remembered something.

"Oi, Rukia," He called to the closet. "didn't you used to sleep in Yuzu and Karin's room after Dad found out about you?"

They heard Rukia's muffled voice from the closet. "I prefer that."

"This woman is batshit crazy." Grimmjow groaned again, sitting on the floor. "And what the fuck am I supposed to do _now?_"

"Just stay at Urahara's. He always lets people freeload at his shop."

"_Freeload my ass!" _The bluenette snapped_. "_I have to clean and _work like a horse _for the meals they give me, and it's barely enough to fill my stomach! I can't even sneak into the kitchen 'cause these bastards put traps around the goddamn refrigerator." He whined. Ichigo released a small cackle. Grimmjow glared at him.

Ichigo cough and regained his cool composer leaning against the door frame. He lifted the book in his hand to cover his face, pretending he didn't just laugh. Then..

"Want to share my bed?"

"What?" Grimmjow eye's widened. Ichigo peeked behind the book with straight face, completely serious. Grimmjow stared at him in shock.

Ichigo blinked.

"...Just kidding." He smirked and closed the book. Grimmjow snarled. "You bastard-"

"What are you doing here anyway?"

"I just _told _you; these bastards make fun of me-"

"That's not what I meant."

"Oh. Well... It's boring in Hueco-Mundo. All the interesting people are gone so... this world is more fun."

"Not arguing with that." Ichigo sighed. "I was serious though. You can have my bed. I'm moving today anyway."

"Moving? What do you mean moving?" Rukia's head peeked from the closet.

"I've worked in part-times lately. I finally got enough money to hire my own apartment. It's a bit empty right now but it has everything I need so I'm moving away."

"Your room _does _seem cleaner than usual." Rukia mused. Then she and Grimmjow smirked.

"Alright," They smirked _at each other _and said in union. "Ichigo! tell us where-"

_"Hell no!"_ The Strawberry snapped and hurled the book at Rukia's forehead, who shut the closet door just in time. "That place is for me to have some _peace and quiet! _And-" He glared at Grimmjow. "I want it to stay _intact_, not in _ruins!_"

* * *

What does Ichimaru call Ichigo? _Ichigo-san?_ _Kurosaki-san?_... _Ichigo-chan?_ Anything? How do you think he could call him?


	3. Blueberry's Strip Poker

"Don't worry, Kira. You worry too much sometimes. Of course Ichigo will let us stay. Hey, Ichigo! We're crashing in- What the-" Renji froze, crouching down beneath the windowsill in Ichigo's bedroom.

On the pillow of the bed sat Rukia, cards fanned between her fingers. In front of her, on the other end of the bed set one of Ichigo's sister's, the scary one with the black hair, crossed legs and also holding cards.

But what made Renji freeze was the man sitting across him on the floor. A blue-haired man he somehow recognized. The man had cards in hand, too, but something disturbed Renji about the scene more than the man notably being an Arrancar.

"What do you want, Renji? You're interrupting our very important game!" Rukia's voice snapped him out of his haze. She took two cards from the deck, smirking. Karin too took cards from the deck infront of her. "Ichi-ni's not here. He has he's own place now."

"What? He moved?"

"Yeah" Karin grinned at the cards in her hand. Then immediately scowled. "And no way you're getting his address from me. Even Dad and Yuzu don't know it; they can't keep a secret for shit." She snarled, turning to the blue-haired.

She and Rukia smiled at the male the only way women who were about to spend all their boytoy's guilt-money on an expensive shopping spree could smile. "Your turn!" They sang together, evil glee in their eyes.

Grimmjow took cards from the deck.

Renji decided it was a good time as any other to let his curiosity show.

"...Why are you naked...?"

Grimmjow flushed deep red and threw his cards on the center of the bed. "Shut up!" he yelled in embarrassment and stood up furiously, wearing nothing but his underwear. The japanese, _traditional _type of underwear, the kind Ikkaku once wore to the beach. "This game is stupid anyway!"

It was at that moment that the knot on Grimmjow's fundoshi decided to get loose and the cloth untied free. Grimmjow watched horrified as it slowly slipped to the ground like a white snake between his tights.

Rukia's eyes widened in anticipation. Karin cringed with a _'Hell no!'_ and yelled something along the lines of being too young for the likes of this while turning her head away in rejection and Renji, still crouched down on the windowsill just watched ludicrously.

* * *

**I honestly don't remember the rules for Poker, so I may have been wrong somewhere...**


	4. Strawberry Homefront

Ichigo's new residence was a two-story building (The Ground level, first story and second story) , with a side staircase and outside corridor leading to the entrance doors of each appartement. Each floor had three doors. Ichigo's appartement was the one before the last, in the second floor.

Renji looked at the note in his hand and at the door. "Well, that should be it." He knocked.

The door opened and Renji put on his biggest smile.

"What's up?" He laughed loudly in his gruff voice, sounding very secure about his actions. "It's embarrassing, but... we need a place to crash in for few d-"

"**No**." Ichigo said formally and slammed the door in Renji's face. He seemed a bit older and more mature from the last time they saw him, but after over a year and more that was only natural. But come on, he didn't even look surprised to see them!

"Oi." The red-haired blinked stupidly at it. "Did he just..._ slammed the door in my face?_"

"I think that's exactly what he did, Abarai." Hisagi said apathetically. Renji's eyebrow twitched.

"_What the hell!__ Ichigo!_" Renji begun hitting the door with his fist. "Open the _goddamn door _before I-"

"Shut up _Idiot!_ Before you'll disturb the neighbors!"

"It's your fault for shutting the door on me! What's with you?! Untill your good ol' pal comes to see you-"

"You only come to _see me _when you need my help and even _then _you won't admit it!" Ichigo snarled, crossing hands over his chest.

"S-so what?! I still come, right?! And we need a place to stay. You let Rukia and that _Espada _freeload in your room-"

"Renji, that's my _father's_ house. Whoever lives there is _his _decision. _This, however,_ is _my _house! I'm paying for this appartement by _**myself**_." The Substitute hissed. "I've worked like an _ass _for the past two years so I could move out of dad's place."

"So?"

_"__**So?" **_Ichigo's eyes narrowed. Hisagi noted the guy's quiet, venomous tone. Kira looked from Renji to Ichigo to Renji, who didn't seem to notice anything. "Um, Abarai-kun-"

"Yeah! you want like, rent from us or something..?" Renji asked. Ichigo glared at him.

_"So."_ The orange-head said again, more thickly as if not hearing Renji's last sentence, face set in deep frown. Kira sighed. He knew that look. Not from _Kurosaki _in particular but he _knew _that look.

"Uhh.." Renji mumbled. He was starting to get nervous. It felt like he has just said something extremely stupid and very very wrong. The malicious way Ichigo was staring at him...

After few moments of awkward silence the seventeen-years-old finally spoke.

He sighed shortly and untangled his hands to put them in his pockets. "Let me tell you a little story."

"Uhh-"

"In the time since I started acting as a Substitute Shinigami-" Ichigo interrupted in calm, collected tone, _unlike_ the erupting terrorizing aura suddenly boiling from him "or, more specifically; getting involved with likes of _**you**_," the power shifted at the word so much that Renji stumbled back from the sheer intensity of the outburst. "I've already stopped counting _how _many times my room in specific and in general, my _**House**_, has been invaded, taken over, or _destroyed_. Even when it was damaged it was somewhat fine because Dad paid most of the repairment expenses. Of course, I didn't knew Dad knew about his son being a Shinigami at that time, and he must have figured that, since he_ 'Didn't know and all'_, it would seem unfair to make his _son_ pay for the repairs though it was a _'Truck crushing into his Clinic' _or _'A bomb thrown into his son's room that blew up the wall'_, and that all these_ 'Accidents' _seemingly had _'Nothing to do with his son'_. And _**yet**_," Ichigo growled through clenched teeth, voice losing the nonchalant and indifference it held in favor of irritation (if the the thick manecing aura wasn't clear enough). "Third of the repair costs came off of _**my **_allowance just because _'I was home at that time'. _Not that I'm complaining' in a way it _was _my fault that the house was damaged."

"**So**," Ichigo steped forward and sent Renji falling with his butt on the floor, emphasized the word with a hiss of cold-fury and blazing glare. "_**You**_,_ Renji_, with your well-nourished _talent _to _demolish _things, are on my Black List's Top Five and the _only _way I am going to let _you _inside my appartement is after it's burnt to the ground and crumbled to gravel and ashes and then I'll make **you **rebuild it because it was probably _**you **_who burnt it with your _amazingly skilled _Kido in the first place!" And Ichigo slammed the door in his face, _again_.

Renji gaped at the shut door with mouth wide open and trembling in shock, Ichigo's words scathing him like hot-white metal.

"That... that was a bit... harsh." Kira mumbled, chuckling nervously.

"Just a bit?" Hisagi mouthed in puzzlement. Renji twitched

"He... he just reprimanded _me _for destroying things?" Renji trashed in disbelief, ready to just kick down the damned door. "_Me?_! _**Him?! **_Why that little _piece of **Shi-**_"

* * *

Renji's got turned down, but it's not the end yet :)

WHAT does Ichimaru call Ichigo?!


	5. Blackberry's Strictly Declined

**I'm sorry, I don't think this Barries names will hold out much longer ._.**

* * *

"You... didn't you notice anything?" Kira berated Renji. "like the way he was _staring_ at you? he was ready to murder you any minute Abarai-kun."

"What?!" the red-haired jumped. "Why didn't you say anything?!"

"I tried but you-... never mind." Kira sighed. "So, what do we do now?"

Hisagi stared at the shut door. "Maybe _we _should try? If Abarai is going to be homeless, at least one of us will get a roof above his head."

"Hey!"

Hisagi stepped forward and raised his clenched hand. The door swung open even before his fist collided with the surface.

"Don't bother, Kensei already tried to convince me of letting you stay here. I strictly _declined_**.**" Ichigo told him and closed it again, murmuring something about horrible guitar players and spooky music.

"...B-but I improved! A lot!"

"No you didn't, you still suck as ever." Renji murmured. "Kira, your turn."

* * *

There's a Bleach Omake about a ghost-story kind of thing, about creepy sounds coming from the school at night, when in reality it's Hisagi's guitar playing. Also, Ichigo has a guitar! (Check the layout of his room in the first episode)


	6. Of Gooseberry

"It's no use." Izuru sighed eventually, turning around from the door, which was slammed in their face, for the _third _time. For his own record though, he could positively say that the Substitute acted more subtle than with Renji. At least Izuru knows he doesn't hold grudge against _him_. "He's not going to let us in. Come on, let's g-** You!**" Kira Snapped in shock, almost choking from his own outburst. "_W-what-.. h-how-.. when-... __**What?!**__"_

"_That_,_ beats me_, and _a month ago. O' today_. Depends if yar Kyoraku-Soutaichou, but I'm dubious." A familiar voice said behind them, and the other two turned around.

Their jaws dropped to the floor. Behind them was a man with white jeans jacket and light-grey pants. Even without his trademark grin and the shades, with _this _hair color and the dialect they could recognize him anywhere.

"Ichimaru!"

"B-but you're _dead!_"

"How-"

Gin removed the sunglass to the top of his head, revealing his silted eyes.

"I just told you;" he said in slight irritation, frowning."What; that. How; I'm alive? beats me" he shrugged. "When; today. I appeared in Soul Society in public only today ba' Kyoraku discovered a month ago I was alive. He wanted to clarify everything and make sure I'm clean (and sane) before unleashing' the Great old' me back to society." He waved off sarcastically.

They still gaped. Gin rolled his eyes and whooshed past them. "Let me know when ya have your brains back."

Renji and Izuru looked like they've just seen a ghost. Shuhhei was the first to regain his senses back somewhat.

"Wait!" he suddenly snapped and grabbed Gin's jacket as he went past him to the door. "Does... does Rangiku-san knows?"

"Of course_._" Ichimaru berated him like a small child who asked something dumb and pulled his arm back. "She was the first to know, very early in the morinin'. The rests were called later to the First Division office." He eyed at Izuru. "Actually, _you _were supposed to come with Rangiku before everyone. Didn't ya get the memo?"

Kira moved his mouth open and close several times without speaking up. He thought about this morning. Ichimaru stared at him waiting for the reply, thinking of _his_ version of this morning, how he watched the Hell butterfly bulletins leaving Kyoraku's office so early. Two of them carried a very specific message.

_'Lieutenant Kira Izuru, you are to come to the First Division Office immediately. Come alone, the Captain-Commender needs to speak to you about highly urgent matter this very instant.'_

Personally, Gin thought the message sounded important enough to come _rushing _to the Soutaichou's Office as ordered, but only Rangiku showed up. And when she did-

Gin shuddered visibly.

"Uhm, are you Ok? you look ill-"

" 'ma fine." He interrupted Izuru harshly. "The bulletin?"

"Uh, yes, I... might have.. missed.. it..." Izuru mumbled awkwardly.

He thought he heard someone call his name frantically this morning, just before going inside the Senkai Gate. Gin gave him a disapproving look.

"D-don't give me that look!" Kira stammered awkwardly, eyes traveling down and side ways. "We were assigned a mission here in the Living-World so I had to leave early and-"

"-Shouldn't you be dead?"

"I was lucky" Gin chattered happily. Izuru looked up to see that Kurosaki has opened the door again and was now talking so-regularly to his Ex Captain.

"H-hey!" The silver-haired man spared him a glance.

"Ya talk too slow so I got bord." He said bluntly and turned back to Ichigo. "Do ya mind if I drop here for a while? I need a place to stay before I find my own. I ain't gonna break or destroy anything and I can clean and cook!" He said, putting on his best salesman smile.

Ichigo regarded them with a scowl. "You lot... how did even you get my address anyway?"

"Urahara-san." The three Lieutenants said in union.

"Kyoraku" Ichimaru said. Ichigo blinked at him in surprise."How did he-" then he remembered his badge and suddenly understood, releasing a short annoyed breath. _Mental note to self;_ The orange-haired grumbled inwardly, _get rid of that damned thing._

"I see." Behind Gin, Shuhhei looked like he'd realized too.

"I see! You're his babysitter!" He said a little too brightly. Ichigo cast him a nasty glare.

"Babysitter?" Kira looked at him questioningly.

"Kyoraku-Soutaichou can trace Kurosaki by that Shinigami badge he was given a long time ago, right? So knowing where Kurosaki is living, he had sent Ichimaru to stay with him, so Kurosaki could keep an eye on him."

"So basically Ichigo is Ichimaru's babysitter!" Renji gloated.

"But I wasn't told any of this... and you're asking politely to stay here?" Ichigo mused, cocking head to the side. Gin nodded, grining.

"So it's nothing formal? it's not an order or anything, right?" Gin nodded again.

"So basically, it's a request from Kyoraku-san." Gin nodded third time in approval. Ichigo sighed longly.

One, two..

"Tell him you're paying runt. I don't have enough budget to feed two people." Ichigo recovered in amazing speed and moved away to let Gin in, ignoring Renji's loud protests.

Ichimaru put up a serious face before nodding again. "Of cou'se!" he stepped into the apartment and stood behind the orange-haired. He grinned, sending the Lieutenants, Renji in specific, a gloating smile.

Renji gritted his teeth with clenched fists. "_Why you little-"_

From beside him, Izuru let out a long, tired sigh.

"You keep saying that a lot lately..."


	7. Last Resort and Deceit

"We still need a place to stay at." Shuuhei sighed. Ichigo leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms.

"Just go to Urahara-san." He said boredly. "There are three of you, right? so the workload he'll dump on you instead of rent should divide, or something."

"Hey, you're right!" Renji brightened, like a new light shining upon him. "I have Hisagi-senpai and Kira with me, so I won't have to do all these annoying chores just to get a single crappy bowl of rice! Thank's Ichigo!" He smiled and grabbed both lieutenant's arms, dragging them back to the staircase with a yelp from both.

Ichigo watched their retreating backs, musing.

"-Or he may just triple the workload in a way that three people would be just enough to get it done..."

...But Renji was too far to hear that.

Gin smiled and chuckled nervously behind him.

"Ya're _really_ a scary kid, ya know that?"


	8. Just Rangiku

From the apartment's balcony, Ichigo watched the three lieutenants exit the staircase and cross the road to the other side.

"You can stop acting now; they're gone." He murmured, pushing himself from the door frame and closing the door behind him. Gin instantly crouched down in the hallway, wrapping his arms around his navel tightly. "Rangiku... she kicked me..." He groaned in pain and shrank into himself in a fetal position. "_Down there-_"

"Really?" Ichigo voiced sarcastically, passing him in his way to the kitchen. "I wonder _why_..." He mused, feigning cluelessness. Gin caught a glimpse of wide smirk on the strawberry's face as passed he him.

He threw the substitute's back a nasty glare.

Ichigo just _grinned_.

* * *

**Note:** Writing Gin is so much _Fun!_ After seeing Gin's flashbacks, you realize that in reality he's not really a creep and can get much like Ichigo or Hitsugaya or other character with sarcastic sense of humor and the _Cold-fury _kind of Deadly-Aura like Byakuya's. At least, This is how _I_ imagined he could turn out without the whole Creepy-Act-to-Fool-Aizen Ordeal.

**...Thank you so much for the Reviews! :). It says a lot to me when readers put the story in the favorites but I also like reading the reviews, even if it's just one repetitious word :)**


	9. Paychecks

_"Kyoraku-soutaicho, this is Tsubokura Rin speaking, from the Research and Development Institute? We are connecting you to Karakura via Hell butterfly, please accept the call. Ichimaru Gin is on the other line."_

"Oh, yes yes, of course. Thank you Tsubokura-kun. Hey, Ichimaru! How's it going?"

_"Fine fine, what's up? listen, I managed to get 'im to alow me to stay here. But I need more money."_

"Money? I thought the amount you got was a little too small but... I figured you'd just stay with Ichigo-san untill you'll manage to establish yourself in the Karakura, like Kisuke-"

_"Well, I am, but untill then I need to pay rent."_

Shunsui looked puzzled. "Rent? but-"

"_An' there's food expenses, wash-bills-"_

"Wash-bills?"

_"For the laundry. We don't have washing machine in here. Water-bills-"_

"Ok ok, I'll send you more money. But... you're you staying with Ichigo-san?"

_"I am."_

"Then-"

_"But he lives alone. He juggles between work and school to pay for the apartment by himself. And he said he hates askin' money from his pap's. He didn't even let your three lieutenants stay here."_

"I see." Shunsui said wisely. "Then I guess I should thank him." He raised his saucer. Beside him, Ukitake shifted to speak to the Hell butterfly.

"Why does he struggles with work to pay rent? Wouldn't it be much simpler if he just used his Shinigami Salary?"

"What Shinigami Salary?" Shunsui and Gin said together. Ukitake gave his old-time friend an odd look.

"_What Shinigami Salary_... you know, his salary from acting as a Susbstitute Shinigami..? the paycheck for a Substitute isn't that high but as a Captain-Level Shinigami who defeated the strongest enemies of Soul-Society and settled some major problems for the Gotei Thirteen he received Bonuses for his actions so... he's... kind of little rich at the moment...?" The white-haired captain's voice died as the new Commander kept looking at him blankly. There was no sound from the flying black billeting either.

Jushiru eyes widened in realization.

"_No wonder _the guys at the Human Resources Department looked so puzzled that Ichigo-kun never spends any of his paychecks besides Seireitei's Repair costs, despite the amount left on his account!"

"..._Huh_." Shunsui tilt his head to the side. "I've always wondered who paid the costs to repair what he'd demolished in his fights over the years." Shunsui cracked a nervous smile. "But.. if you are saying he doesn't even _know_..."

Silence.

_"...I _ain't _telling him. No way. 'e'll kill me." _Gin's scowling voice cracked, echoing from the fluttering messenger. _"...How much does he have anyway?"_

Jushiro said the current amount. _Approximately_.

Shunsui spat his Sake with a choke. The butterfly halted for a moment, nearly losing it's flight.

_"I am __**not **__telling him."_

* * *

**Think about it**. Shinigami _do _receive a paycheck, So it's only natural that Ichigo will have a salary of some kind. I mean... overwise it'll be like exploiting

**Again: **Writinig Gin is _So Much Fun!_ *squeals*

..I'm on a roll. It's just that I have the next chapters already ready so... I'm tempted to post them all at once.


	10. Jobs

**dedicated to reviewer: Hurmmm**, for his brilliant ideas for Ichimaru's employment xD (_And for answering my question about Gin, Thank you :D_) I immediately started writing this when I read it. Hope you don't mind me using this! **Readers, If you don't ge****t it, just read his comment xD**

And No, I don't do any parings here, just to clear things out. Bleach is 99% platonic and that's what I like about it. But as a Yaoi fan I might do some.. ah, fan-service, but nothing too big or OOC.

* * *

In Ichigo's living-room floor, Gin flipped through the pages of several newspapers and magazines spread before him. Ichigo set on the couch, with the TV open just for the sounds to fill in the silence. He had a thick book on his lap and was trying to study.

"How about a kindergarten Teacher? 'ma good with kids-"

"No. You look like a Pedophile."

That bolt was fast and hard, hitting him like sixty-five miles-per-our car running over him in the middle of the freeway. Fast enough to strike from nowhere but slow just enough for him to feel every wheel weighing on his bones.

In other words, that hurt. That really _really hurt_.

"Oh _come on_, it's your own fault for developing that nasty habit of smiling like a creep. Stop brooding and get back to searching! you want a job, don't you?!"

Ichimaru went silent.

"What? you found something?"

Gin showed him the spot on page. "How about this one?"

Ichigo stared, eyes twitching. "Oh yeah, I'm sure everyone will _really_ appreciate that! No doubt Rangiku-san will be _totally _thrilled with you working in a _shop like **that!**" _Ichigo yelped with accusing finger on the page, face red with embarrassment and slight irritation. The silver-haired pulled the adult magazine back.

"Actually yes, I think Soutaicho-sa' will a appreciate that _very_ much. He's got s very pervert mind, ya know, and I could bribe him with goods! Your friend the Sixth's-lieutenant too and Lisa-shan and-"

"Ok, Ok! I get it! move on already!"

* * *

**P.S:** Gin has a talent for threading needle? Since when? Unless it's... a metaphor for Shinso or something? Or I just didn't understand that line...

*Sixty-five miles-per-our car - about 100 kilometers per hour, little more.


	11. A line Crossed

It was evening. The sun was setting. Urahara and Tessai were off on some _business with the kids_ (_pleasure_. They heard him saying he needs a day off.) and Renji was there in the shop, seating like a pig, and smelling like one.

"That's it."

Renji threw the wooden box on the floor. He was hungry, the kitchen was booby-trapped, and Urahara-san loaded all this absolutely _unhuman_-_like _workload on the three of them (-_'divide the workload' _My _Ass, Ichigo!_) -he was not going to stand for such abuse anymore.

_Damn_ these boxes are heavy. "Let's go, we're leaving! I'm not someone's pack animal, I want food goddamnit! I _need_ food!" He signet the two to go after him, out the front door of the store.

"Where are we going, Abarai-kun?"

"To have dinner at Ichigo's. I didn't want to use _that _so quickly, but desperate times requires desperate measures. I'm sure Taicho will understand. Come on, we're going to get some _food_."

* * *

Tam traram! *insert drums* can anyone guess what is _'That'_?


	12. Strawberry-Ichi-Rich

They ate dinner in silence.

"Alright, what's the big deal?" Ichigo burst in irritation. For the past ten minutes the silver-haired has been throwing him strange, wary glances across the dinner table Ichigo set in his living-room.

Of course Ichigo noticed. So did everyone else. And Ichigmaru's wary staring created unnecessary, unexplained tension in the air, which wasn't helping considering the situation of the three lieutenant eating at the same table with a supposedly-dead-supposedly-traitor-Captain was already awkward enough.

"How much do you get from your part-times?"

"Enough to keep me going, why?" Ichigo said. "What," he realized. "You're afraid you won't be able to keep up with the rent? Don't worry about it," He sighed. "It was a request so I'm not going to throw you out. Just send the bilsl to Kyoraku-san or something. He'll pay me back sooner or later." he said lightly and they resumed eating quietly._ 'He better pay me back or else...'_

"...It's not that." Ichimaru said after a minute or so.

Ichigo's eye twitched. Hisagi and Kira released a short breath and Renji snapped.

"Then what _**is **_it?!" Renji cried, desperate and annoyed. That tension was starting to get on his nerves as well.

Gin looked at the substitute warily.

"...Ya know you have a bank account in Soul-Society, right?"

Ichigo's hand halted, holding a piece of salmon above the bowl in the middle off the table. He looked confused. "What?"

"You have a bank account in Seireitei." Ichimaru said again, this time more clearly. "For your Shinigami Salary. Every Hollow ya killed, every Plus ya sent off, every minute ya spent in yar Shinigami uniform goes into your paycheck. Ukitake-taichou opened you an account when he gave you that Substitute Badge."

"Really? Why didn't I heard about any of this!"

"Well..." _He _forgot. _We... _didn't know. "I guess he thought it was obvious, ya know, since being a Shinigami is also a job an' all. But a Substitute's check isn't much. Your're only half-Shinigami after all. "

"Figures." Ichigo nodded, putting the food he got from the bowl in his mouth.

"You also got bonuses."

"What, like for New Year and such?" he asked, reaching with his chopsticks for another dish.

"No." Gin placed his bowl and chopsticks on the table and turned fully to Ichigo. He looked so serious that Ichigo stopped moving and blinked. "Kurosaki-san, you are a Captain-Level Shinigami. Captains's salary is far higher than that of an average Shinigami. And you did some things even the Captains weren't able to carry out, thus fixing some issues for Soul-Society that could turn into a major ordeal."

"Like yourself?" Renji murmured. Kira elbowed him in the guts under the table. Renji crouched.

"Basically ya covered Soul-society's ass on more than one occasion, so naturally ya got some _really _big Bonuses. The Kasumi-Oji for example, put a respected amount in your account for your behalf. And as much as he might deny it, I know for a fact that Kuchiki-taicho donated a sum that definitely didn't come from your monthly paycheck. supposedly his show of gratitude for saving Rukia-chan, I presume."

"What?!" Renji bolted head up. "I _also_ saved Rukia and I never got any bonuses! And I'm his _lieutenant!_"

"And how did _that _go for you?" Ichigo and Gin stated sharply, pointedly. A no-so-subtle reminder that Renji, in fact, had _failed _to do the one task intrusted to him; escape with Rukia away form the Sokyoku-hill. Renji blushed.

He had _one _job...

"I-it was _your_ fault!" He snapped a finger at the silver-haired.

"What are ya talking about? _I _wasn't even there. It's not my fault ya couldn't get away from Kaname." and to prevent the conversation escalating to a direction unwanted by at least one of the dinners at the table, he added; "So how much was your first monthly paycheck, Sixth-squad lieutenant?"

"Isn't it obvious? a First-month Lieutenant salary."

Gin raised an eyebrow, grin slowly spreading. _First-month Lieutenant Salary? _"How much?"

"Shouldn't you know?" Renji looked at him ludicrously. "About three... no *four hundred, thousand yen-"

"What?!" Hisagi dropped his chopsticks. Kira stuttered in half-astonishment, half-complain tone.

"Bu-but that's _twice_ my salary!"

"Well, yeah, it's the _First-month Lieutenant's_-"

_"No!" _the blond and the black-haired yelled together.

"B-but Taicho said-"

"There's no such thing as a_ First-month Lieutenant's Salary_, Sixth-fukutaicou" said the grinning Fox-face.

Renji opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. Captain Kuchiki, apparently, purposely gave him a bonus for saving his sister, after he himself tried to kill both of them. No -scratch that; _three _of them, Ichigo included. And Byakuya lied about it too.

Renji was at loss of words.

"So?" Ichimaru turned back to the Strawberry. "What do'ya think? Ya're Rich!"

Silene spread around the table as the three Lieutenants thought about the Ex-Captain's words. They knew Captain's salary was rather big, because they are far stronger than anyone on their Division and had major responsibilities to uphold. They also knew Ichigo was stronger than some of the Captains, and as Gin said, was particularly Soul-Society's Messiah...

Ichigo apparently had the same line of thoughts. His hand trembled slightly for keeping it hovering over the table with his chopsticks holding fish for so long. He swallowed and asked quietly.

"...How much?"

Ichimaru told him.

Ichigo dropped the fish. Izuru spat whatever he was chewing. Renji hit his forehead on the table and Shuuhei (sitting between Ichigo and the silver-haired), who already swallowed, started choking and coughing.

Gin (who removed his rice-bowl from the table so to not get their chewed-leftovers from their mouths after they choked) had resumed to eating cheerfully. "Well, ya did had to pay for whatever ya destroyed when you fought in Seireitei but for the most part, you ain't even _close _to the red zone."

Ichimaru hit Hisagi's back to make him spit (or swallow) on whatever he was choking. Ichigo blinked.

_So Seireitei's repayment costs came from his salary? Well, isn't that familiar.._

He stared for a moment. Gin returned him his usual smile across the table.

"Che." Strawberry snorted, picking the fish again. "_Figures_."

* * *

*After short check: In japan, average monthly salary is around 250,000 yen, more or less. I assume the lieutenants and captain's salary is kinda big. I** Have no idea if it's correct! **Let's pretend four hundred thousand yen is huge, Ok? If not, just made up any amount you think.

I remember Gin tends to call people by title, with his mocking tone; like Jyu-ban-tai Taichou-san; Tenth squad Captain or something. So...


End file.
